


Advent Candles

by shehasabadfeelingaboutthis



Category: MSR - Fandom, The X files
Genre: Baby William, Christmas AU, F/M, Fluff, Fluffy Smut, MSR, Mulder x Scully, at least happier than the show I guess, kinda family au, post-season 8, the run era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-24
Updated: 2015-12-24
Packaged: 2018-05-08 23:05:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5516561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shehasabadfeelingaboutthis/pseuds/shehasabadfeelingaboutthis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU, in which right after the birth of William in 2001, Mulder went on the run with Scully and the baby, while Monica and John kept working on the X files and with Skinner they helped them from inside the bureau. So basically season 9 didn’t happen. </p><p> </p><p>This fic was written to the sweetest Victoria (@wheresoulsreside) for Christmas, because she’s my special internet BFF, who has the ability to constantly making my day, and for whose friendship I’m really grateful for. The merriest Christmas, Vic, I love you so much!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Advent Candles

**Author's Note:**

  * For [shutupmulder](https://archiveofourown.org/users/shutupmulder/gifts).



**December 1, 2001.**  
**Somewhere East, close to the Canadian borders**

Blue winter sky sparkled through the window blindingly on that Saturday morning, it waked him up. The curtains of the motel room were missing, just as half of the wallpapers, or any kind of taste or the smallest homeliness. Everything was calm, so he didn’t move, just let his eyes wander around the room.  
He thought back when he spend so many nights alone in this kind of cheap roadside motel rooms, running through case files, snacking sunflower seeds, with the TV’s cold blue light flashing in the background. In these nights, when he got tired and his head was full of blurry and confused thoughts about the case, the truth, the beautiful partner of his in the other room, what she could do, what she could wear right now, he always tried to distract his thoughts with observing the room. Now, laying in the bed, blinking into the morning sunlight, he could recall all those room’s every little details he observed, thanks to his photographic memory.  
Since May, things have been different. His mind couldn’t recall a single memory about the accommodations of the past half year. After driving and trying to avoid attention while spending time outside for all day, arriving to an insignificant and cheap motel, renting the room, hastily arrange what has to be arranged then fall into bed, just to wake up early in the morning and start the whole thing from the beginning. It all blurred together, seemed like a dream to him. Though things has settle down a bit, they could spend a couple days in the same place, walking in the local parks, sleeping enough, or just resting on the couch for an hour or two, it still felt strange.  
He allowed himself to observe this time. This was a typical cheap room, with yellowed walls and creaky, tough bed and an unidentifiable stain on the rug. Despite the place’s atmosphere, he find this morning very peaceful. He closed his eyes and just listened to the noises. He listened, as the woman who mattered the most gently breathed on his side, her skin feeling warm and smelling wonderful, and he listened as his little son making small noises in his sleep on the other side of the room.

 _It could be like this_ – he thought, and for a second he saw a nice house, kissing Scully goodbye before taking William to school, then kissing her again in their office down the basement, feeling safe and fixed between the papers that spoke about madness, about the truth.

At this moment, William started to stir and cry. Next to him, Scully immediately responded: eyes still closed, half asleep, she moved to the baby’s direction. Mulder touched her arm, leaned over her to kiss her temple.  
“I got it” – he murmured then got out of the bed, a bit shivering of the cold room’s air in his pants, he walked to his son. They’ve bought a cheap but safe and comfy collapsible pram on the second or third day of the run, in some secluded town’s supermarket, and since then it was William’s bed for the nights. It wasn’t perfect at all, and sometimes they talked about how their son deserves so much better, but at least they were together, protecting and loving him.  
“Hi buddy” he whispered to the baby as he held him “Have you dreamt something nice?” William immediately stopped crying. He always did in his strong arms. Mulder, still holding him, climbed back to the bed, in a half-sitting position he placed the baby to his lap. Scully drowsily smiled at them and touched William’s soft and mostly bald head.

“I think it snowed at night” Mulder told “The evening was cold enough for that and now the sky is so blue and clear just like it’s usually after snowing”  
“That would be William’s first snow ever” she answered, smiling at him, not entirely with a honest smile. Mulder embraced her with one arm, kissing her forehead.  
“Let’s make that count, okay?” he suggested.

 

 

 

**December 2, 2001**

Scully fell asleep on the couch while feeding William, and Mulder decided to visit the motel’s shop opposite their room. He wanted to buy a newspaper, maybe a coffee, and they were out of a few things. He wasn’t sure if they sell diapers or fabric softener in a souvenir shop, but surely he’ll get sunflower seeds.  
He checked his wallet: there was still enough money until they reach the next station. They couldn’t pay with credit cards since it was traceable, but Skinner came up with a less risky and workable solution for sending money to them.  
Before they left, they got a code for a locker in a railway station somewhere in Oklahoma. Skinner promised to call up a cousin of his who lived nearby and asked for his help. By the time they reached the station, quite enough cash was placed in that locker by the cousin, along with a note, which marked the next locker’s data where one of Monica’s friend will put some cash in 10 dollars’ bank notes and again, a new address.  
The system worked well in the past 6 months, they always got enough money for food and accommodation and for the vital things, and the places of the lockers led them to east for the winter.  
As Mulder step inside the little shop, the first thing caught his eyes was an Advent wreath with one burning candle on the counter. _It’s Advent_ – he thought. He never really cared about that holiday, but he knew it was important to Scully. Once she told him that at Advent Sundays the family came together for a tea, lighting one more candle on the wreath every week, while listening to Christmas music, then go to church together. _Or at least what left of the family_ – she didn’t say that out loud then but he could see it in her eyes. Two years ago she even invited him, but he said no, not just because he was sure Bill Scully would kick him out but also because he felt it too intimate, too personal to intrude.  
He left the shop with four little candles and a cassette with old Christmas songs hiding in his pocket.

 ***

She was in the shower. Mulder carefully put down William in the middle of the king size bed, making sure he won’t fall off.  
‘Let’s surprise mommy, shall we?’ he told to his son, while he placed the four candles to the coffee table. He grabbed the old and dusty cassette player from the corner and hoping it works, he put the cassette in it. He lit one candle, switched off the lamps, took up William (who was completely enchanted with looking at the dancing flame of the candle) with one arm, and waited. He heard Scully closing the tap, stepping out of the shower, the familiar swishing of the towels and her silky pajamas. Then, after she brushed her teeth, he finally turned on the cassette player. For a second, it creaked and growled, but then finally ‘ _The First Noel_ ’ softly swam into the air.  
She immediately appeared in the bathroom’s door.  
‘Mulder?’ she asked with a choking voice, her face perfectly contoured by the candlelight.  
‘It’s Advent’ he said and wrapped her with his free hand. Scully buried her face between his chest and William’s little head. Her hair was still wet a little bit and Mulder could feel her vanilla shampoo making the perfect mixture with the baby scent that was everywhere as he kissed the top of her head.  
‘Are you sad?’ he asked a few silent moments later.  
‘No, I’m…’ – fine, she wanted to say as she step away so she could face him. But she didn’t say.  
‘Yes. I’m sad. And I’m happy’ – she said instead. Hazel eyes locked into ocean blue full with tears, he nodded. They didn’t have to say it, they knew it without putting it into words. _I am grateful for having you_.

 

 

**December 9, 2001.**

‘My roots are getting quite red, I need to paint them soon’ she said staring at the mirror, more to herself than to him. William in his arms, he stood behind her, and touched her shoulder.  
Her natural hair color was quite conspicuous, something easy to recognize, so she decided to paint it. They bought hair dying product for her in a drugstore. She became blonde, that dirty and common type, with soft curls since she stopped to iron it. She cried when she first saw it in the mirror, and he kissed her tears away, telling her she’s beautiful a hundred times. She was. Though he missed the ginger light framing her face, her big blue eyes looked at him at the same way.  
‘See, you still have red hair’ he whispered her playfully that night and she laughed, agreed that luckily the carpet doesn’t match the drapes.  
After feeding him, Scully put William to his pram for an afternoon nap, then joined Mulder, who was reading a newspaper in the other side of the room, on the coach. She silently kicked her shoes off (she wore simple but comfortable boots that time) and put her legs over Mulders. Then she grabbed the book she was reading recently, and in comfortable silence they relaxed reading together. But not for a very long time…  
Everything sharpened at a sudden moment; she must fell asleep or something, but something wake her up. For a half moment, she didn’t even realize what, but then she caught Mulder’s gaze and the realization scalded her lungs with coldness.  
The lights went out, only a single flashlight made any kind of light. Her flashlight, spinning above William’s pram.  
She didn’t even realize what does mean yet when Mulder already know what to do.  
“Bring William” – it sounded like an order, but his face showed everything but confidence – “I get the money and the bags. Car keys…” – she saw his hands shaking a bit as he handled her the keys of their rented car. She grabbed the spinning flashlight and threw it away. William’s mouth curved down.  
“It’s okay, mummy will get you and other, okay?” – She murmured as she took up the baby and headed to the front door with Mulder at her back.  
Suddenly Mulder stopped and grabbed her arm.  
“Someone’s at the door” – he whispered. She held her breath back and she heard the small noise of someone trying to open the door from outside. Their eyes locked for a significant second, sharing all the intense of their feelings right now with the other, then again, it was Mulder whose reactions were faster. He grabbed the car keys from her hand and praying it for working, he pushed the alarm button. Somewhere near outside, their rented car started to squawks with a sharp sound. Apparently, the person who tried to enter, stopped. They heard people’s voices, complaining about the loud alarming car.  
_A crowd gathers_ – she thought – _clever._  
They heard as footsteps moved away from the door. Mulder silently sneaked to the window, and looked out.  
“All clear” – he still whispered, as he threw a packet of money to the bed– “Let’s get the hell out here”  
Their hearts beating in their throats, they sneaked out of the motel room. Mulder stopped the car’s alarm, and they got in as quick as they could.  
The nearest car rental place was just a few blocks away. Scully put their things and William’s carrier from the big black Rover to an insignificant green Fiat as Mulder explained to the owner why they have to transact this car exchange as quick as possible.  
“My wife’s father is in hospital. The doctor just called us that his condition suddenly became very serious, and he may only live for a few hours. The hospital in which he is in a few hours of driving away, but she really wanna say goodbye to her dad, and this morning there was some problem with the alarm of the car and I wanna make sure there won’t be any troubles on the road…”  
The owner looked at his and then her upset and worried faces and didn’t ask a thing, just gave the keys of the car. The Fiat screeched as he stepped on the gas to disappear as soon as possible.

***

Only after hours of driving and leaving the state, they dared to even speak. She was the one who broke the silence.  
“I think I have to feed William soon” –she said, as she turned back to take a look at the peacefully napping baby.  
“As soon as he wakes, we’ll stop. I think…I think no one followed us” – he answered, never taking his eyes off the road.  
“Mulder?”  
“Hm?”  
“Was it…I mean, is that possible that they found us…that it was one of them? The…one who tried to enter”  
“You mean, was it a supersoldier? I honestly don’t know, Scully. Maybe one of them find us, maybe because what William did or he did it because he knew they’re coming, I don’t know. Either way we’re extremely lucky that we got away with that. It could have been the FBI though. The whole bureau should been looking for us, since we left house arrest, stole those case files which was the bureau’s property and left a place covered with disappeared men’s blood in Democrat Hot Springs, but I think they just happy we don’t spit in their soup anymore. And maybe it was something else, friendly or less friendly.”  
She didn’t answered.  
Only half an hour later, when they stopped at a patrol station next the road, she felt her muscles finally relax. She fed William while he refueled and checked their map how to reach the next locker. William fell asleep and she put him back to the carrier, and she joined Mulder, who sat on a bench a couple steps away from the car. He wrapped her in a tight hug, and kissed her cheek. She felt his growing beard scratching her roadsun-bleached skin; she didn’t particularly like it, but she didn’t care as long as he was there, as long as he whispered her name in that scratched, virile voice of his, as long as she could bury her face into his sweaty t-shirt, inhaling his scent as it would be her life blood.

They drove all along that night, sat in a comfortable silence, road lights flashing on their faces as if candle’s flame danced around. _O holy night_ softly played from the car’s radio. It was Advent’s second Sunday.

 

 

**December 16, 2001.**

William got the flu, therefore he was peevish all day. He cried for everything, he didn’t sleep, he barely ate anything, and neither of his parents could calm him. At least he didn’t move anything with his mind – Scully was more than grateful for that – but at the end of the day, they were both pale with exhaustion. When he finally fell asleep, they collapsed to the uncomfortable bed of the motel. They laid there for a few seconds in silence, next to each other, half-asleep. Then Scully suggested to skip shower, just jump into pajamas and sleep. He didn’t protest.  
Only when they were stuck under their blankets, almost asleep, she remembered they didn’t light the candles.  
‘It’s Gaudete Sunday’ she murmured sleepily.  
’What does that mean?’  
’The Church celebrates Joy and Happiness, which comes to the Earth with Christ’s birth. There’s also a glorification of the Mother on this day’s ceremony’  
Mulder got up, placed three candles to the nightstand next to the bed and lit them. He climbed back, and placing a gentle kiss on her cheek, he spooned Scully.  
‘You never asked me about him’ she whispered.  
‘What?’ he asked, eyes already closed.  
‘About William. You never asked me about my pregnancy, what was it like to carry him…when you were gone’ she turned to face him, gazing at each other for a long second. He didn’t say anything, just waited her to open up.  
‘I learned about being pregnant by accident – she started to speak - they run a routine blood test after…you know, when you were gone, I tried to find you before the FBI does, and I went to Arizona with Skinner, and later John Doggett arrived, and Gibson Praise was there…oh God, I hardy remember what happened there exactly. But I do shoot a bounty hunter who looked like Skinner. I felt sick, they brought me to the hospital, and checked me’  
‘That’s why you were sick.’  
‘What do you mean?’  
‘In Oregon. You felt sick the night before I was abducted. Was that because of him?’  
‘I think so’  
Mulder’s thoughts wandered for a while, she could feel him spinning, tasting the words in his beautiful mind. He finally asked the question she expected.  
‘Did they ever made a DNA test?’  
Scully sighed. They already discussed how they might made tests on the fetus during the early phase of her pregnancy, how he is possibly having different gene structure as the result of these tests. They talked about his miraculous birth, how he is possibly not entirely a lab result, not a developed hybrid. They even talked about the promise he made a long time ago. Yes, he wanted to be the father of her child.  
But they never talked about his conception. And though she was clearly a test subject for the government’s experiments, considering other facts, it was highly possible that she got pregnant from him.  
They didn’t use protection that time, anyway.  
She was claimed to be barren, and after spending seven years desperately trying to stay away from each other, of course they didn’t want anything to be between them. Not even a thin layer of plastic.  
‘No they didn’t’ she answered finally ‘They only checked whether he’s having human DNA or not. But Mulder…he’s yours.’  
‘How do you know?’ he asked sadly, unconsciously thinking about how they took away even this from him. Even the certainty of being the father of his son.  
‘I just know. I…feel it. I think mothers can feel this. I remember after that case with that invisible deadman, spending the night with you was…different. I can’t explain how exactly. It was just different, not because of you or because of me. And calculating the dates…’ she felt his eyes monitoring her face ‘I think he might conceived then’  
William snorted in his sleep and turned to his side, but didn’t wake up. Scully continued speaking.  
‘When you were gone, for days I felt like I’m in coma. I only ate because my unconscious doctor kept telling me to eat for the baby, but I didn’t taste any of the food. I was staring at the mirror and telling myself I’m going to wake up in the next second…but I didn’t’ - her eyes filled with tears, but Mulder kissed them away, pulling her closer. Listening to his heartbeat calmed her.  
‘I’m here now’ he said finally ‘and I won’t leave ever again’  
‘Oh, and Mulder…’ she whispered to his chest ‘when I was pregnant, I always wanted to eat sunflower seeds by the way’  
He chuckled, softly hummed _Silent Night_ in her hair until she fell asleep in his arms.

 

 

 

**December 23, 2001, a little town in North Dakota**

The railway station of the town was noisy and crowded because of the upcoming holiday, it was easy to get the letter and the cash from the locker without anyone noticing. They parked at a secluded place near the station, and while Mulder got the money, Scully fed William. He was still eating, eyes closed, squelched, hiccupping. Mulder watched his son for a while, how peaceful his little face seemed even though he has never known ‘normal’ or ‘peaceful’ life. Scully, caressing his head, looked at Mulder.  
‘Where will be the next station?’ she asked.  
‘I haven’t checked yet’ he said and opened the envelop which was attached to the money. Normally, a note fell off with an address, but now there was a key and a letter, with Doggett’s handwriting.  
Scully raised an eyebrow, as Mulder started to read it loudly.

_“If there are any traces of that someone’s opened this envelop, go South, to Nebraska, there will be the next locker. I asked a friend of mine to deliver this letter without opening it or telling about it anyone. There’s a key in the envelop – it opens my parent’s holiday house. Cozy place, on the bank of a little lake in the forest, with a fireplace. With a comfortable driving speed, you’ll reach the house by tomorrow afternoon. It’s hidden and safe, and empty right now. You guys deserve a few days resting before going to Nebraska. Merry Christmas!”_

Mulder turned the paper: on the other side there were two addresses, one in Nebraska and one somewhere in Washington State. He looked at Scully, whose eyes were wide as she stared at the letter like it was some holy revelation.  
‘What do you think?’ he asked, already knowing the answer.  
‘Did he mention…fireplace?’ she asked, and after so many months she looked young again, as she was.  
They spend the night on the road. Neither of them were tired – the promise of the holiday house and a peaceful holiday pulled them away like a magnet.  
She sang _‘I’ll be home for Christmas_ ’ as a sleep song to William, of course completely out of tone – yet it was beautiful, especially when their eyes met, blue and hazel sparkling like the four lighting candles of the Advent wreath.

 

 

**December 24, 2001**  
**Christmas Eve, at Doggett family’s holiday house**

They drove on the small forest road at twilight, the sky was pink and orange. The house was hidden between pines, it has wooden cover. The air smelled like snow and the temperature was quite cold, as they got out the car. Scully hold William close to keep him warm until Mulder opened the front door.  
The house smelled like wood and a bit dusty. There was one big area in the center, with the fireplace and the kitchen. Three doors led to two bedrooms and the bathroom.  
‘Umm Scully? Have you got any idea how to build a fire?’ Mulder asked, looking a bit worried at the fireplace, after they turned on the lamps.  
‘Of course I know’ she answered as she carefully placed William on the couch.  
‘How so?’ he shook his head because _of course_ she knew how to build a fire. Was there anything she didn’t know?  
‘We usually went tenting when I was little, and I always helped my father. Now, would you bring in some wood? I saw that there were a wood pile next the house which we can use’  
Mulder nodded, and grabbed the basket next to the fireplace. He found the wood pile that Scully was talking about, and filled the basket with wood. Before he went back, he stopped for a minute.  
Everything was so silent here, almost like the forest were dead. He looked down the near lake. It wasn’t freeze, but its surface was so still that it seemed like frozen. He took a deep breath, and let the silence went through him. It felt so good, after spending months on the road, never stopping to rest, never stopping to worry.  
But it was Christmas Eve tonight, his son’s very first Christmas, and they were at a safe house, more or less protected. And he felt it’s his goddamn right to celebrate the holiday with his family in peace. He walked to the nearest pine and cut down a few branches.

 ***

The fire cheerfully crackled, it rhythm so well with ‘ _White Christmas_ ’ softly playing in the background and the sound of William babbling to his father. Scully couldn’t imagine a nicer background noise for dinner, especially when Mulder’s boyish laugh joined as William tried to tap on his watch with his little baby hands.  
The dinner wasn’t anything special, indeed. They stopped at a local supermarket down the town, bought diapers for William, a prepackaged chicken with some green stuff, a bottle of vine and chocolate ice-cream. Mulder was determined to buy a present at least to William, and he was very satisfied with himself when he found a soft alien toy, even though it was green, and smiled friendly.  
She heated the chicken, and lit their worn out advent-candles. Mulder found a cassette player, and put their Christmas music on. The pine branches he brought were placed on the table in a vase. They put William in his carrier, and placed him on the table as well. The little boy’s enormous blue eyes were filled with excitement and he couldn’t stop babbling. They talked about meaningless things, just enjoying each other’s voice and presence. His feet touched hers under the table, and she reminded herself not to forget to thank this to John.  
He washed the dishes, as she bathed William, blowing bubbles and drawing heart on his little stomach with soap to make him laugh.

Mulder sat on the rug in front of the fireplace, wrapped up in a blanket. He looked up as she came to him after putting down William, reaching out his left hand, offering her a place under the blanket. She cuddled him, facing the fire to feel its heat on her face. There was silence between then for a while.  
‘I could get used to this’ he said.  
‘Me too. You know, I’d like to imagine that one day, when we can stop, and settle down, we’ll have a place like this. A house in the middle of nowhere, nothing remarkable, just a home. Our home’  
Their eyes locked, gazing at the reflection of the fire in them for a while, then he leaned down and kissed her. It started slowly, more like tasting each other. He closed his eyes and let him merge with the feeling of her teeth under his tongue. Then he pulled her closer and deepened the kiss.  
They leaned down, he on the top of her, kissing, feeling the other’s skin. Mulder started to unbutton Scully’s shirt and she giggled into his mouth.  
‘What?’ he breathed between the kisses. Scully pulled away so she could face him.  
‘Are we seriously making love in front of the fireplace? Like in those bad romantic holiday movies?’  
Mulder giggled as well.  
‘Oh, we surely do. We’re making sweet love in front of the fireplace. Do you want me to call you Dana, darling, my love?’  
‘I prefer when you whisper “Scully” to my ear in that tone it make my name sounds like a dirty word’  
‘So that’s what you like, “Scullaay”, huh?” he joked, kissing her earlobe. She laughed, kissing him again.  
They made slow, sweet love, indeed. Small touches, kisses placed everywhere, laughing and whispering, then coming as gazing at each other’s eyes – and feeling blessed, feeling complete.  
They stayed on the rug, cuddling, enjoying the afterglow.  
‘Merry Christmas, darling’ he hummed the song.  
‘Mulder?’  
‘Yes?’  
‘Regardless what we’ve been through this year…this was the most beautiful Advent in my life. Thank you.’  
He didn’t answered, just touched her hair as it glowed red again of the flame’s light.

**Author's Note:**

> please note that english is not my first language, so there might be mistakes. Please do let me know about them!


End file.
